Coaching Tip - 23rd November 2011 The Beauty of Life Are you subscribed to the Life Happens LIVE podcast? Press play below to listen to the podcast version of this coaching tip
Click here to subscribe to Life Happens LIVE via iTunes "Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it." - Confucius They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, which is a notion that has always intrigued me greatly. We all have moments, every so often, in which we ponder deep philosophical questions, like, ‘What is the meaning of life?’ or ‘Does a falling tree make any sound if there is no one there to hear it?’ While we can go round and round in our heads never really getting to the bottom of these issues, it’s still interesting and fun just to investigate the riddle. One of the questions that I seem to have spent a good chunk of my down time contemplating is, ‘Why is it that certain things appear beautiful to some people and not others?’ I don’t know if I’ll ever find an answer that truly satisfies my curiosity (and I’m ok with that), but there is something that has occurred to me that I think is relevant to each of us, in terms of the amount of beauty we get experience in our lives; it is this:
Or to put it another way; when we are at peace with ourselves, the world seems to be a more beautiful place. Or to put is yet another way; I’ve rarely heard a stressed out person describe their situation or surroundings as a delight to behold! When we are connected to the innate wellness that is part of the fabric of our true authentic selves, we have a tendency to see beauty everywhere. Have you ever found yourself relaxing in a quiet spot, observing your environment though a wider lens than you would ordinarily look through on an average day, just noticing the perfect flow of life? How easy it is, in that peaceful state, to pick out intricate details of your surroundings that you may never have noticed before? And have you also found that, for some reason, it brings a kind of contented smile to your face? Beauty and wellbeing are interconnected. In the same way that ink needs a blank page in order for words to be written, beauty needs a peaceful state of mind in order for it to be truly appreciated. When we are caught up in our thinking we are more inclined to experience the world through the filters of our preconceived judgements and beliefs, and often the beauty of life is invisible to us. It has not gone anywhere; we just don’t have the eyes to see it. Of course, I’m not referring only to beautiful things that we perceive visually; beauty is much deeper than that. Beauty can found in everything, from sights and sounds, to concepts and feelings. For me, beauty is as much a spiritual experience as it is a sensory one, but wherever we believe it to exist, it does require us to be present and open to receiving. When we live life from the outside-in (that is, when we let what happens on the outside of us determine how we feel in the inside) we let our egos subjectively decide what is to be beautiful to us, or not. But when we live from the inside-out, from our essential selves, beauty can be a quality that is experienced in all things; even the mundane. Something that I find particularly beautiful is a sunset. I’m usually captivated by them. Now, I say ‘usually’ because I know that it has not always been the case. Most of the time when I look at a sunset it takes my breath away; I am filled with awe and I am humbled by the marvels of the natural world. To me, it can be like appreciating a priceless work of art that has been painted across the vast canvas of the sky. Other times though, when I’ve caught sight of a sunset, it hasn’t really done that much for me at all. It’s not that I’ve changed my mind about sunsets being beautiful; it is just that for whatever reason, in that moment, I am not at the right level of consciousness to be emotionally moved by it. So we could say, then, that the difference that makes the difference in whether I see the beauty in a sunset or not, is my state of mind. I realise that when I am relaxed and at peace within myself, my attention will be drawn like a magnet to a fiery red sky, and my enjoyment of its beauty will be effortless. But if I am caught up in my own thinking; believing my stressful thoughts, or experiencing tension in my body, a beautiful sunset is likely to come and go, and I will hardly notice it. It will be as if, in that moment, the pictures and the sounds I am making up in my head are louder and more vivid than what is actually going on around me. But that doesn’t mean that the opportunity to experience the beauty isn’t up for grabs. The point I’m making here is that every moment of every day we are immersed in the opportunity to connect to the beauty of our lives, and the only thing we need to do is to become quiet and still, and be open to experiencing it; be that in what we see, what we hear, what we touch, or even who we are with. I believe that the world and the Universe (and therefore life itself) is an inherently beautiful place, regardless of whether we are open to seeing it or not. I also believe that the only thing that can ever stand in the way of our appreciating the beauty that exists all around us is our own thinking. Regular readers will know I have written many times about the innate nature of wellbeing; that we are all born with our wellbeing already inside us and that it never goes anywhere, despite our innocent attempts to cover it up with the hypnotic power of our own thinking. Whenever our thoughts slow right down, we naturally relax and become more peaceful. That is when our wellbeing bubbles up to the surface, like a beach ball popping up and out of a swimming pool the second we let go of our efforts to keep it held down beneath the water’s surface. So, why is it that wellbeing comes up when we calm down? Because that is the way the Universe works. Everything in the Universe, including us, is born out of the same principles of creation, and it all functions perfectly according to universal laws. The overriding quality of the Universe is that it exists in perfect harmony with itself. The only thing that is out of harmony with the rest of the Universe is the ability we have developed to think of ourselves as being separate entities. Thinking too much causes us to distance ourselves from the peace that is naturally all around us. When we let go of our thoughts, that connection is re-established in the form a sense of inner calm and wellness, which points us in the direction of noticing the beauty of life. Ralph Waldo Emerson summed it up nicely when he said, “Though we travel the world to find the beauty, we must carry it with us or we find it not.” Here is what occurs to me when I think about that statement. The reason we see so much beauty in the world when we are in a peaceful state of mind is because our innate wellbeing is, itself, the true essence of beauty. So really, the beauty we experience around us is actually our own inner beauty being reflected back. So I guess a more accurate way of saying “beauty is in the eye of the beholder”, would be, “beauty is in the ‘I’ of the beholder.” If wellbeing is the essence of beauty, and wellbeing is innate, then you, by definition, are innately beautiful. Accept it! HOMEWORK Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to see how much beauty you are capable of perceiving around you. As a suggestion, why not go for a walk around your local neighbourhood and look at it as if you are seeing it for the first time. Take the time to walk slowly and deliberately; feeling the ground beneath your feet and the air on your skin. Breathe deeply and, as best you can, clear your mind, expand your vision, and simply take in as much of the detail as that there is to notice. Rather than seeing familiar objects with their usual labels attached to them (house, car, tree, grass, pavement, bird…), experience them all as if they were nameless and part of one perfect whole. Pay curious attention to the interplay of shapes and form, colours and textures, sounds and sensations. Look out for beauty wherever it maybe. I’ve no doubt that, if you’re willing, you will begin to experience beauty in the most unlikely places: perhaps in the cracks in the pavement, or in the bark of a tree, or in the sound of a passing car, or even in the colour of a piece of discarded litter. As the beauty of everyday life reveals itself to you, don’t forget to smile, because really it is your wellbeing that you are experiencing, and it is you who are beautiful.
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